On the morning of my 25th birthday, I opened the window – something fell into my room.
An orange ladybug – on its back, not moving. I was terrified of insects but also, late to work so I went on my way and thought I will deal with it at my return.
End of the day, no ladybug to be seen.
The horror. She’s alive and somewhere inside my bedroom.
A few days go by and thus began a game a hide-and-seek.
She keeps coming back to me and I don’t know what to do.
I won’t kill her – it’s not her fault I’m afraid of insects.
I won’t put her outside – she will froze to death or get eaten.
I’m telling a friend about it – he tells me to look up the spiritual meaning of it. At this point, l’ve never considered myself spiritual but ended up looking out of curiosity.
“Orange is related to our creativity, vitality, fertility and overall health. So, to see an orange ladybug relates to these things, especially healing and fertility.”
Around that time – I started to realise how much painful memories I had from France. So I started considering this ladybug as my own cheerleader for my emotional healing journey. Every time I would see her get close to me, 1 would say to myself it means I need to keep going – I’m on the right path.
And a few weeks later – I was in pain (Ah – life ). I needed to let go of many many things. And like a lot of other times in my life when I needed to process things – I did it creatively. So I drew my portrait and added the colours and shapes of my healing ladybug. A sign of growth and healing. Yes I was hurt, but this time I was growing from it.
Acrylics on an used board made of mixed wood
59,6 X 76,1 cm
December 2022 – March 2023
